Well, in short, we can’t.
Understanding what is good and what is bad presents a philosophical issue, that the reality of an event, decision or experience is impossible to fully understand until enough time has passed that we can trace backwards the journey that moment has made.
I am reminded of the Zen Farmer, a tale from Buddhism that explains very simply why our initial judgements can often be irrelevant to how things actually play out:
There is a Taoist story of an old farmer who had worked his crops for many years. One day his horse ran away. Upon hearing the news, his neighbors came to visit. “Such bad luck,” they said sympathetically. “Maybe,” the farmer replied.
The next morning the horse returned, bringing with it three other wild horses. “How wonderful,” the neighbors exclaimed. “Maybe,” replied the old man.
The following day, his son tried to ride one of the untamed horses, was thrown, and broke his leg. The neighbors again came to offer their sympathy on his misfortune. “Maybe,” answered the farmer.
The day after, military officials came to the village to draft young men into the army. Seeing that the son’s leg was broken, they passed him by. The neighbors congratulated the farmer on how well things had turned out. “Maybe,” said the farmer.
This simple tale does a great job of explaining how we have no idea what the eventualities are that follow from something happening.
Non-Attachment
The farmer exemplifies a sense of detachment from events, neither becoming overly elated by good fortune nor despondent over misfortune. This reflects the principle of non attachment in psychology, where we learn to let go of rigid attachments to outcomes. reducing suffering and increasing resilience.
Mindfulness & Acceptance
The farmer’s response of “Who knows what is good and what is bad?” demonstrates a mindfulness-based attitude of acceptance. It highlights the importance of being present in the moment, acknowledging events without judgment, and accepting the impermanent nature of life.
Cognitive Flexibility
The farmer’s ability to see beyond immediate circumstances and recognize the unpredictability of life encourages cognitive flexibility. In psychology, cognitive flexibility refers to the ability to adapt one’s thinking and behavior in response to changing situations, fostering resilience and problem-solving skills.
Reframing
The farmer reframes events by questioning the fixed judgments of good and bad, encouraging a shift in perspective. This reflects the therapeutic technique of reframing, where individuals learn to reinterpret situations in a more constructive and empowering way, reducing distress and promoting growth.
Equanimity
The Zen Farmer is a powerful example of the nature of equanimity, a state of calmness and composure in the face of uncertainty, suffering and psychological distress, a neither excited or depressed approach, an acceptance of the complexity of life and the rejection of binaries and simple conclusions.
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